【文体特点】
说明文是以说明为主要表达方式来说明事物、阐明事理的一种文章体裁。
【写作指导】
写说明文时要注意以下几点:
1. 抓住事物的特征。
2. 合理安排说明顺序。常见的说明顺序有时间顺序、空间顺序和逻辑顺序。
3. 灵活采用不同的写作手法。常用的写作手法有下定义、列数据、举例子、作比较、分类别等。如:
(1)下定义
Body language is a language without words that consists of gestures, facial expressions and body movements that greatly add to and sometimes even replace spoken language.
(2)列数据
The seas aroundAustraliacontain over 160 different kinds of sharks, which vary in size from just 20 centimetres to over 14 metres.
(3)举例子
Metals are such things as iron, gold and silver.
(4)作比较
Compared with his early works, the later plays are dark and forbidding.
(5)分类别
British and American English are different in many ways. The first and most obvious way is in the vocabulary. … There are a few differences in grammar, too. … The other two areas in which the two varieties differ are spelling and pronunciation. …
4. 注重语言的客观性。可以使用被动语态或引用权威的信息来源来增加文章的客观性。
5. 时态多用一般现在时。
【真题再现】
学校正在组织科技创新大赛,你想为日常生活中某件物品(如钢笔、书包、鞋子……)设计添加新功能来参赛。请以“My Magic ________”为题写一篇英语短文,介绍你的创意。
内容:
1. 说明设计理由;
2. 介绍新功能。
注意:1. 词数不少于120个;2. 不能使用真实姓名和学校名称。
(2014年湖南卷书面表达)
【审题定调】
本写作任务要求考生发挥想象,为日常生活中的某件物品设计添加新功能,同时说明设计理由。体裁属于说明文,时态以一般现在时为主,人称可根据具体情况确定。
【参考范文】
My Magic Shoes
To make our life easier and the environment more beautiful, I have designed a pair of magic shoes. Compared to the traditional ones, they have three new unique functions.
Firstly, the shoes are made from specially produced recycled paper which can stand high pressure and temperature and will never wear out.
Secondly, there’s no need for you to wash them, for they wash themselves.
Most magically, they can be used as a means of transportation. When you want to get somewhere quickly, they will speed up by themselves and you will have a sense of flying. Because of these shoes, in the future fewer and fewer people will drive cars. In this way our world will be greener and cleaner.
字母和数字
【范文点评】
本文覆盖了所有内容要点(开门见山地表明设计理由,接着描述了为鞋添加的三项新功能),应用了较多的语法结构(如非谓语动词、定语从句、there be句型、状语从句、形容词比较级)和高级词汇(如compared to, unique, wear out, a means of, speed up),并且有效地使用了语句间的连接成分(如for, most magically, because of, in this way),完全达到了预期的写作目的。
【学生习作】
My Magic Pen
Pens are a very important tool in learning. They are used almost every day. Pens which we use now are helpful, but they can also cause trouble for us. Once the pen falls to the ground, for example, its penpoint will be bent. And often ink. So I have invented a magic pen.
First, the penpoint of the magic pen is made of hard metal. There is no need to worry about bending. Second, there is an ink pocket in the magic pen. When the ink is finished, ink can be added to the pen by itself.
I believe that this magic pen will be popular with the public.
【点评】
该习作基本完成了试题规定的任务。要点齐全且作者思路清晰、所使用的词汇和语法结构能满足表意的需要,也使用了简单的连接成分。但存在的问题也比较明显:一、部分内容表意不清,如第一段中的And often ink;二、文章所用语法结构和词汇比较简单,需增加较复杂的语法结构和较高级的词汇;三、文章的词数不够(要求不少于120个)。
【改后稿】
My Magic Pen
Pens are a very important tool in learning. They are used almost every day. Though helpful, they can also cause trouble for us. Once a pen falls to the ground, for example, its penpoint will be bent. And its ink often runs out unexpectedly. So I have invented a magic pen.
First, the penpoint of my magic pen is made of a new material that can last a long time without becoming damaged. Second, there is a spare ink pocket in my magic pen. Ink can be added to the pen automatically when it is used up for the first time. And more importantly, the indicator in the pen will show you how much ink is left.
I believe that this magic pen will be popular with the public.
【实战演练】
下面是另一位同学的习作,请根据点评中指出的问题对它进行修改。
My Magic Glasses
Nowadays, there are more and more people who are short-sighted around us. Most of them wear glasses all day, because they can’t see anything clearly without glasses. It’s very inconvenient for them, so I have created a pair of magic glasses which can recover the sight.
My glasses can gradually help people to see something clearly, and in the end, they can see distant things clearly. Besides, the glasses can help people find other health wrongs and correct them. And believe it or not, the glasses can also be used as a telescope or be used as a microscope when it is necessary.
I believe my magic glasses will be used by everyone and be popular around the world one day.
【点评】
该习作完成了试题规定的任务。文章结构清晰,过渡自然。存在的问题有:一、部分表述繁琐,简化处理后会更简洁明了,如首句及第二段末句; 二、部分语言使用不规范或用词不准确,如recover, wrongs, correct;三、文章结尾部分的说法过于绝对。另外,为了使文章所用词汇丰富,第二段首句中的两个see … clearly以及末句中的be used可以换一种表达方式。最后,为了使修改后的文章词数符合要求,可适当增加细节。
【答案】
My Magic Glasses
Nowadays, there are more and more short-sighted people around us. Most of them wear glasses all day, because they can’t see anything clearly without glasses. It’s very inconvenient for them, so I have created a pair of magic glasses which can help people’s sight recover.
My glasses can gradually improve people’s eyesight, and in the end, they can get rid of glasses forever. Besides, the glasses can help people find other health problems and cure them without the owner’s awareness. And believe it or not, the glasses can also function as a telescope or a microscope when necessary.
I believe that my magic glasses will be liked by anyone who has poor eyesight and be popular around the world one day.